What's In My Pageant Bag?

Yo, It's me, Sam. Actually, it's Miss Teen Seattle Sam to you. (If you haven't seen my award-winning dance, CLICK HERE!)

Sure, I made winning look easy, but let me tell you, the pageant world is brutal. To survive you gotta be totally prepared. That's why I always keep the following things in my purse when I go pageant-ing.

1. A Taser
'Cuz SOME girls steal your lip gloss! I won't mention any names, but you know who you are, Miss Pre-Teen Seattle 2003! I haven't forgotten!

2. Eye Liner
To write my pageant answers down on my arm, of course. What? There's nowhere in that dress to stuff a cheat sheet!

3. Adult Diapers
Not for me... for my mom. It's a LOOONG competition! And she has a phobia about public toilets.

4. Ranch Dressing
I use it as conditioner AND it makes a great dip for the spare ribs and chicken in my purse.

5. Cold Hard Cash
Because sometimes the best talent is figuring out how to pay off the judges.