Fat Cake Madness

Good morning... or good afternoon... or good night... Wow, this internet thing is crazy... you could really be reading this at ANY time. Totally insane! It's really late at night for me right now. But I wanted to let you know about my day... and also I'm eating a big turkey leg and don't want to go to bed yet, so I'm gonna write ya a blog.

So, you know how I won that contest at school by guessing how many Fat Cakes were in the giant tube to win Locker #239? Well... along with the locker, I also won ALL of the 2,718 Fat Cakes -- which sounded awesome at first, but after I ate way over a 1,000, I got kinda sick of them. I tried to give them to Freddie, but his mother doesn't allow sugar products in the house (freak). So, here's what I did with the rest of them:

    * Gave some to my mom to use as stuffing for her bra.
    * Sent some to the troops overseas. We heard that they didn't eat them but they did use them to build a temporary shelter.
    * Fed one to a local raccoon. Then, I heard you shouldn't feed wild raccoons. We now have 50 on our porch!
    * I wrapped up some and sent them to my aunts and uncles as very late Christmas presents.
    * I used some as fertilizer for our herb garden. Now our herbs have 50% more fat than ever before -- but they taste GREAT!
    * Filled Lewbert's smart car with 100s of Fat Cakes. He wasn't happy but at least I got rid of the raccoons who now live in his backseat.
    * Gave some to the hobos on the corner. They gave them back.
    * I cut open a few of those bad boys, squeezed out the cream, and used it as hair gel. It really worked... for days.
    * Gave some to my parole officer. He really liked them.
    * Put the last of the Fat Cakes in the blender. Added cottage cheese, yogurt, and apple juice. Drank those babies right up. What? My mouth was tired of chewing. Don't judge.

P.S.:
Here's a pic of Gibby posing with all of the Fat Cakes that I won.

And here's a pic of the awesome locker I won, Locker #239.

Later,
Sam!